I am writing this with the hopes that this will be incredibly hilarious later (though Micah manages to find humor in it now and asked me this morning if it was funny yet).
Pregnancy hormones are a-ragin'. It's quite the new experience. I've never had really awful PMS or anything of the like, beyond forgetting to take birth control every now and then.
But this is something completely new, that isn't assisted by the fact I have to get up several times in the middle of the night to go the bathroom or that Inu has decided to go out between 4:45 and 6:30 every morning for the last two weeks and will persistently whine until we let her out...then she'll bark 30 minutes later at someone walking to the bus stop and, not only wake us up again, but wake the whole neighborhood before the sun rises.
EARLY Thursday morning I went on one of my many bathroom trips and took a very nice beer glass Micah and I got on our honeymoon with me. I was planning on getting water to bring back to the bedroom for the morning. In my exhausted stupor, I was not careful where I set the glass and put it on the edge of the sink. So it rolled into the sink and broke into many, many pieces.
Thursday was a tough day at school and I forgot about the glass incident. I got home around 6 from work, chilled a little, and went to start dinner. I had decided that Thursday night would be the night I would prepare a steak for the first time. I was all excited to follow the directions I got from the "meat market" and make Micah a nice dinner, to be ready when he got home from work.
Well, the steak didn't cook, so Micah had to do some work on it. Then I put it under the broiler to finish cooking it and it caught on fire...
It was still very tasty, but wasn't done medium-well (as you must have when pregnant) so AFTER I ate it, I started to cry because I was afraid I hurt Miss Bell. Then I remembered about the broken glass and confessed it to Micah...then I started to look around the house and realized I hadn't folded laundry, done the dishes, etc. etc. etc., for days. I started to feel like a failure of a wife, so I started crying more...
In a last ditch effort to be a good wife, I decided I would put the dogs out for the night. Elmer went out with no problem. He barked after 2o minutes so I went to get him. BUT on the way into the house, he paused for just a nanosecond at the door before I opened it then bolted off the porch.
I got all the way into the house before I realized that I had failed at my final task of the night and burst into tears.
peace.
Friday, February 27, 2009
Monday, February 16, 2009
Pictures
I hope this picture gives you a good idea of how excited MISS BELL is to have us a parents! :)
(She is hiding in picture, but sticking out her hand with a thumbs up sign!)
We had our ultrasound today. Here are the stats:
Miss Bell weighs in at a whopping 9 ounces. She measures 18 weeks, 5 days. She is a week older than we initially thought (height wise and developmentally), but we are sticking to the July 20th guess date.
We were shocked to discover we are having a girl! Both of us were certain we were having a boy! But we are excited none the less (though I think Micah is still processing what it means to have a girl in the family...he is one of three boys and never even had a girl dog during childhood)!
So bring on the pink! :)
peace.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
What's up, pup?
I am sitting on the couch with my incredibly handsome husband and he just read the title of this blog. His only response was, "Who is pup?" To which I replied, "I don't know it rhymed with up." Deep insight for this moment.
General Life News
I find myself with fewer things to say now-a-days as I feel I am becoming redundant. I am feeling better to an extent, but still exhausted and pretty unmotivated. I had a bad cold through January, took the lowest dose of Amoxycillin possible for a week, felt better for about a week, and am now all icky again. I started to slowly lose weight, but last Sunday decided that a one-topping Papa John's pizza sounded mighty tasty and Micah was so excited that I actually wanted something that we got one. And it did adequately satisfy.
So, really, that is about my life right now. I am spending lots of the energy I do have teaching...the big school program is at the end of March. It seems like plenty of time away, but I poorly planned this year and ISTEP (Indiana's standardized testing program) falls at the beginning of March (even though we took it last September as well). Which means I lose some valuable time with the kiddoes. Bummer, I know.
But really, it is a bummer. I became a teacher for lots of reasons, but one of the benefits is that being a teacher totally fulfills my extroverted side.
Anything exciting?
Today we made an offer on a new vehicle for Micah. Which is really very exciting. You see, Micah has been driving a '98 Neon with 175,000 miles, no driver's side mirror, windows you can pull out of the door, and three major oil leaks. Plus it has a pretty gold stripe where someone painted it with spray paint. But, soon, NO MORE!
In the big picture, Micah will be a stay at home Dad, so he needs a good reliable car. And what's more reliable than a Toyota? So, dear readers, we put down a deposit on a 2003 Toyota Matrix today. It was having some issues with idling which will be evaluated on Monday, but hopefully it is a cheap and easy fix which will end up costing us $2000 under blue book.
Oh yeah, we also took Inu to make sure she would fit in the hatch. She did. And then promptly took her muddy paws and jumped into the back seat. So we have now begun researching a variety of pet travel supplies to prevent her from jumping on Baby Bell.
Baby News
We will find out if we are having a boy or girl on the 16th! More than anything, I am excited to see our baby again. We saw Baby Bell at 5 weeks and 7 weeks due to complications, but (praises) we haven't had any since.
Sometimes I think about how preposterous it is that we only get to hear our baby once a month for the first 6 or so.
I think we felt baby kick for the fist time last weekend, but it was so light that I am a little unsure-it could have just been gas.
Sorry for a boring post, loyal readers. I usually like to try to be insightful, but have heard through the grapevine that brains truly shrink in pregnancy. Which goes to explain a lot-mainly why I got on 70 West the other day when picking Micah up from the airport. We were 56 miles away from home before I asked Micah if we had driven through the city yet...at least Micah has a good sense of humor.
peace.
General Life News
I find myself with fewer things to say now-a-days as I feel I am becoming redundant. I am feeling better to an extent, but still exhausted and pretty unmotivated. I had a bad cold through January, took the lowest dose of Amoxycillin possible for a week, felt better for about a week, and am now all icky again. I started to slowly lose weight, but last Sunday decided that a one-topping Papa John's pizza sounded mighty tasty and Micah was so excited that I actually wanted something that we got one. And it did adequately satisfy.
So, really, that is about my life right now. I am spending lots of the energy I do have teaching...the big school program is at the end of March. It seems like plenty of time away, but I poorly planned this year and ISTEP (Indiana's standardized testing program) falls at the beginning of March (even though we took it last September as well). Which means I lose some valuable time with the kiddoes. Bummer, I know.
But really, it is a bummer. I became a teacher for lots of reasons, but one of the benefits is that being a teacher totally fulfills my extroverted side.
Anything exciting?
Today we made an offer on a new vehicle for Micah. Which is really very exciting. You see, Micah has been driving a '98 Neon with 175,000 miles, no driver's side mirror, windows you can pull out of the door, and three major oil leaks. Plus it has a pretty gold stripe where someone painted it with spray paint. But, soon, NO MORE!
In the big picture, Micah will be a stay at home Dad, so he needs a good reliable car. And what's more reliable than a Toyota? So, dear readers, we put down a deposit on a 2003 Toyota Matrix today. It was having some issues with idling which will be evaluated on Monday, but hopefully it is a cheap and easy fix which will end up costing us $2000 under blue book.
Oh yeah, we also took Inu to make sure she would fit in the hatch. She did. And then promptly took her muddy paws and jumped into the back seat. So we have now begun researching a variety of pet travel supplies to prevent her from jumping on Baby Bell.
Baby News
We will find out if we are having a boy or girl on the 16th! More than anything, I am excited to see our baby again. We saw Baby Bell at 5 weeks and 7 weeks due to complications, but (praises) we haven't had any since.
Sometimes I think about how preposterous it is that we only get to hear our baby once a month for the first 6 or so.
I think we felt baby kick for the fist time last weekend, but it was so light that I am a little unsure-it could have just been gas.
Sorry for a boring post, loyal readers. I usually like to try to be insightful, but have heard through the grapevine that brains truly shrink in pregnancy. Which goes to explain a lot-mainly why I got on 70 West the other day when picking Micah up from the airport. We were 56 miles away from home before I asked Micah if we had driven through the city yet...at least Micah has a good sense of humor.
peace.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Wonder
Every year I take my students to the symphony. All 1st through 6th graders. Some wear suits, some wear uniforms, some flower girls dresses...we get on a bus and go downtown to listen to the Indianapolis Symphony Orchestra play at Hilbert Circle Theater.
Every year I wonder how they hear the music...what they think while sitting in oversize theater chairs straining to see over the person's head in front of them. I wonder what the 1st grade students are experiencing being that most of them have never been in such an environment.
At church last night I think I may have gotten a glimpse of the thought processes of a first time symphony attender. As the pastor was preaching about Revelation (the infamous book from the Bible about the end of the world) he went into a metaphor between the symphony and the nations. He spoke in detail about sitting at the top of Hilbert Circle and watching the musicians "play their instruments," about the crowd erupting in applause for the "first chair," about the tuning where the first chair plays a note and then everyone plays it as well...and how that is like the world. Chaos brought in tune.
I caught the message of the sermon, but it left me with perspective about my students and how I believe God wants us to live.
We spend a good three weeks preparing for the symphony. We go over the instrument sounds, listen to excerpts of the performances we will hear, review vocabulary, and talk about being "music critics" and the kinds of words we should use to describe our experience.
But in the end, they sound a lot like my pastor. There are an incredible amount of incorrect terms used to discuss what they liked, didn't like, and thought of the performance. They use unsophisticated language to express their opinions and impressions.
But, like my pastor, they are passionate about these thoughts, opinions, and experiences. They are struck by the extremes of the symphony-how incredibly loud and powerful unified voices can be, but also how sweet, quiet, and sensitively they express themselves.
In all honesty, I can get really annoyed and feel like a failure of a teacher in moments like this. But listening to my pastor last night and watching his face light up with passion and excitement over his symphony experience, I realized I am missing the point both as a teacher and as a child of God.
My students may not use the correct terms, but they are awestruck and in complete wonder at the symphony. They are empowered. They feel worthy and like real people in real society. They love going to the symphony.
Shouldn't we be the same when experience a new power of the Lord? Shouldn't we stand in awe of what He has done and is doing? Shouldn't we be amazed at his power, might, and love? And shouldn't this lead us to be passionate about our experiences-even if we don't know exactly the correct terms?
peace.
Every year I wonder how they hear the music...what they think while sitting in oversize theater chairs straining to see over the person's head in front of them. I wonder what the 1st grade students are experiencing being that most of them have never been in such an environment.
At church last night I think I may have gotten a glimpse of the thought processes of a first time symphony attender. As the pastor was preaching about Revelation (the infamous book from the Bible about the end of the world) he went into a metaphor between the symphony and the nations. He spoke in detail about sitting at the top of Hilbert Circle and watching the musicians "play their instruments," about the crowd erupting in applause for the "first chair," about the tuning where the first chair plays a note and then everyone plays it as well...and how that is like the world. Chaos brought in tune.
I caught the message of the sermon, but it left me with perspective about my students and how I believe God wants us to live.
We spend a good three weeks preparing for the symphony. We go over the instrument sounds, listen to excerpts of the performances we will hear, review vocabulary, and talk about being "music critics" and the kinds of words we should use to describe our experience.
But in the end, they sound a lot like my pastor. There are an incredible amount of incorrect terms used to discuss what they liked, didn't like, and thought of the performance. They use unsophisticated language to express their opinions and impressions.
But, like my pastor, they are passionate about these thoughts, opinions, and experiences. They are struck by the extremes of the symphony-how incredibly loud and powerful unified voices can be, but also how sweet, quiet, and sensitively they express themselves.
In all honesty, I can get really annoyed and feel like a failure of a teacher in moments like this. But listening to my pastor last night and watching his face light up with passion and excitement over his symphony experience, I realized I am missing the point both as a teacher and as a child of God.
My students may not use the correct terms, but they are awestruck and in complete wonder at the symphony. They are empowered. They feel worthy and like real people in real society. They love going to the symphony.
Shouldn't we be the same when experience a new power of the Lord? Shouldn't we stand in awe of what He has done and is doing? Shouldn't we be amazed at his power, might, and love? And shouldn't this lead us to be passionate about our experiences-even if we don't know exactly the correct terms?
peace.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Sleepless nights
So, let's talk about how pregnancy has been treating me.
It's hard. I'm exhausted all the time...10 hours of sleep a night and going to bed between 7:30 and 9 are commonplace...my lower back hurts from carrying the extra weight in my chest...I can only eat a few bites of something before I start to feel nauseous, then I am starving while nauseous a half hour later. I recently got my first bad headache, borderlining a migraine, and was pretty sure my head had expanded three times its original size and would explode at Inu's next bark. I feel like I have to poo all the time, but don't go to the bathroom, and I do have to pee constantly.
The last sentiment leads me to sleeping. Granted I have only gained 5 pounds in 13 weeks. That is one pound more than I should have gained, but not too bad really. I figure I am carrying most of it up top and a bit in my belly. Though it is enough that I can't wear pants that sit right below my belly button anymore.
All that said, my body isn't too different, which means it shouldn't be hard to sleep.
But it is.
I struggle to get comfortable without taking over the entire queen bed. I steal the covers all the time and then get tangled. And I have to get up to pee every hour.
Micah has recently brought it to my attention that, before I get up to use the restroom in the middle of the night, I announce that I have to go. Which means, I wake Micah up to tell him what is happening. I always fall back on the "You're narcoleptic which means you can fall right back asleep" issue, but I guess that is not acceptable when I am interrupting a REM cycle.
This has all culminated recently when I woke Micah during the last full moon to ask if someone had put a street light in the alley. It was THAT bright. It really looked like someone was shining the brightest flashlight ever in through our west facing window.
Thursday night I woke Micah again to have him look at the moon. On Saturday he let me know that the brightest moon of the year was going to happen that night. We then got into a discussion as to whether it was proper for me to be waking him to let him know completely benign thoughts throughout the night.
During which I told him that I thought I was making the right decision. So he started mocking me and said, "I'd do it all over again."
And I was so excited because I had done it all over again!
Needless to say we were both bummed when the clouds covered the brightest moon of the year last night.
peace.
It's hard. I'm exhausted all the time...10 hours of sleep a night and going to bed between 7:30 and 9 are commonplace...my lower back hurts from carrying the extra weight in my chest...I can only eat a few bites of something before I start to feel nauseous, then I am starving while nauseous a half hour later. I recently got my first bad headache, borderlining a migraine, and was pretty sure my head had expanded three times its original size and would explode at Inu's next bark. I feel like I have to poo all the time, but don't go to the bathroom, and I do have to pee constantly.
The last sentiment leads me to sleeping. Granted I have only gained 5 pounds in 13 weeks. That is one pound more than I should have gained, but not too bad really. I figure I am carrying most of it up top and a bit in my belly. Though it is enough that I can't wear pants that sit right below my belly button anymore.
All that said, my body isn't too different, which means it shouldn't be hard to sleep.
But it is.
I struggle to get comfortable without taking over the entire queen bed. I steal the covers all the time and then get tangled. And I have to get up to pee every hour.
Micah has recently brought it to my attention that, before I get up to use the restroom in the middle of the night, I announce that I have to go. Which means, I wake Micah up to tell him what is happening. I always fall back on the "You're narcoleptic which means you can fall right back asleep" issue, but I guess that is not acceptable when I am interrupting a REM cycle.
This has all culminated recently when I woke Micah during the last full moon to ask if someone had put a street light in the alley. It was THAT bright. It really looked like someone was shining the brightest flashlight ever in through our west facing window.
Thursday night I woke Micah again to have him look at the moon. On Saturday he let me know that the brightest moon of the year was going to happen that night. We then got into a discussion as to whether it was proper for me to be waking him to let him know completely benign thoughts throughout the night.
During which I told him that I thought I was making the right decision. So he started mocking me and said, "I'd do it all over again."
And I was so excited because I had done it all over again!
Needless to say we were both bummed when the clouds covered the brightest moon of the year last night.
peace.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Thoughts on race...
Nothing light for this post...but I've been thinking, more than normal, about racial reconciliation recently. And wishing it was a nice little issue we could box up the solution to and wrap it with a bow. But it's not. And being an educator in the inner-city, as well as living in a neighborhood with one other white person besides Micah and myself, well, it isn't something I can just put on the backburner.
I am not faced with awful situations every day. I don't regularly condemn people different than myself and, minus a few instances my second year teaching, don't really have people take notice of my pasty complexion.
But I was recently talking to a white man from South Africa and he made the comment, "70% of adoptions fail." Which had me thinking because, before Baby Bell, Micah and I planned on adoption. We still continue to plan on adopting (one or both of us are getting "fixed"). And while I have seen adoption adjustment be a struggle, I haven't really seen it "fail."
So that started the race dialogue in my head. It was escalated the other day by something that happened while I was driving. Then I read an article on www.theblackcritic.com, "Am I racist?", that kind of hit home.
Is racism to be expected in each person? How do we combat it? Is it something that we can ever rid ourselves of? Or will we let the various people who fit stereotypes continually feed into our expectation of race?
Here is what I do know, from my observations.
Ignoring race and ethnicity is not in the best interest of the child.
It is not effective to pretend to be something you are not.
Skin color does not equal life experience.
Socio-economic status seems to play an equal role in societal expectations, and a larger role in educational expectations.
I cannot beat myself up for being a white, female teacher in an inner-city school. (and minus about 4 students, my whiteness has had little affect on my influence.)
I don't know what it is to physically be a minority, so I can't empathize.
peace.
I am not faced with awful situations every day. I don't regularly condemn people different than myself and, minus a few instances my second year teaching, don't really have people take notice of my pasty complexion.
But I was recently talking to a white man from South Africa and he made the comment, "70% of adoptions fail." Which had me thinking because, before Baby Bell, Micah and I planned on adoption. We still continue to plan on adopting (one or both of us are getting "fixed"). And while I have seen adoption adjustment be a struggle, I haven't really seen it "fail."
So that started the race dialogue in my head. It was escalated the other day by something that happened while I was driving. Then I read an article on www.theblackcritic.com, "Am I racist?", that kind of hit home.
Is racism to be expected in each person? How do we combat it? Is it something that we can ever rid ourselves of? Or will we let the various people who fit stereotypes continually feed into our expectation of race?
Here is what I do know, from my observations.
Ignoring race and ethnicity is not in the best interest of the child.
It is not effective to pretend to be something you are not.
Skin color does not equal life experience.
Socio-economic status seems to play an equal role in societal expectations, and a larger role in educational expectations.
I cannot beat myself up for being a white, female teacher in an inner-city school. (and minus about 4 students, my whiteness has had little affect on my influence.)
I don't know what it is to physically be a minority, so I can't empathize.
peace.
Friday, December 26, 2008
Christmas Recap
Micah and I started Christmas last weekend. We braved the northern Indiana ice storm and went to my sister's Friday night bearing Hot Box Pizza breadsticks. Saturday we spent with Ma and Pa Bell eating wonderful food, experiencing great company and conversation, opening blessed presents, and laughing hysterically while playing euchre (Micah and I dominated 2 of 3 games...woot).
Sunday we took a drive to admire the ice storm, got coffee at Micah's favorite coffee place in the Fort, played video games with Cassie and Trevor, went on a date for lunch, the visited with my family for Christmas. Again we had great company...I love my sisters, got to see the newest niece, and just got to "be" with my side of the family. We were blessed abundantly through food, gifts, and conversation.
Yesterday we got to have our very own special Christmas. It is the only one we will have to focus on each other. So we did just that (minus the trip to pick up our escape artist), we had the world famous Schaab Christmas breakfast, opened presents for Christmas, had snacks, opened Micah's birthday presents, ate lunch and cake, watched Ironman, and had pizza for dinner. The gifts we each received were a mixed of "necessities" (each of us functions off of 4-5 work shirts and don't always keep up on the laundry well enough) as well as blessings.
I really love to bake and cook, so Micah got me some fancy schmancy kitchen stuff (I got the sifter I asked for) as well as the Buffy Season 8 comics and the Decemberists vinyl singles. I got Micah a few movies, Settlers of Catan, some lounging pants, and Ron Paul's manifesto.
I had a moment during the day where I realized I hadn't really taken the time to reflect on Jesus. I also realized that I wrote about the exact same ocurrence last year. And I even think I came to the same conclusion...
Jesus should be central in every moment of this life. Most days, He is. Some days He ranks right with doing the dishes in the aspect of maintaining my relationship with Him. But for the most part, He is the reason for this life and my pursuit of attempting to live as He calls us to.
It's the every day living that gets tangled for me...how do I react the person who cuts me off on my 5 block drive to work? Does the class that constantly tests my patience know that I'm really trying to love them? Am I supposed to work once Baby Bell comes? Am I OK if Micah stays home with the baby? We live fairly minimally as is, but am I OK letting the people we support know that we may have to cut their support so one of us can stay home with Baby? Is my family really my first ministry? If they are, why do I feel guilty about that?
You know, simple things...like how to live like Jesus.
So, I take December 25th to enjoy the blessings He has given...my family and my husband. A few gifts and a great meal. Time spent together. And I trust God still loves me-even if I forget to read Luke 2.
peace&love.
Sunday we took a drive to admire the ice storm, got coffee at Micah's favorite coffee place in the Fort, played video games with Cassie and Trevor, went on a date for lunch, the visited with my family for Christmas. Again we had great company...I love my sisters, got to see the newest niece, and just got to "be" with my side of the family. We were blessed abundantly through food, gifts, and conversation.
Yesterday we got to have our very own special Christmas. It is the only one we will have to focus on each other. So we did just that (minus the trip to pick up our escape artist), we had the world famous Schaab Christmas breakfast, opened presents for Christmas, had snacks, opened Micah's birthday presents, ate lunch and cake, watched Ironman, and had pizza for dinner. The gifts we each received were a mixed of "necessities" (each of us functions off of 4-5 work shirts and don't always keep up on the laundry well enough) as well as blessings.
I really love to bake and cook, so Micah got me some fancy schmancy kitchen stuff (I got the sifter I asked for) as well as the Buffy Season 8 comics and the Decemberists vinyl singles. I got Micah a few movies, Settlers of Catan, some lounging pants, and Ron Paul's manifesto.
I had a moment during the day where I realized I hadn't really taken the time to reflect on Jesus. I also realized that I wrote about the exact same ocurrence last year. And I even think I came to the same conclusion...
Jesus should be central in every moment of this life. Most days, He is. Some days He ranks right with doing the dishes in the aspect of maintaining my relationship with Him. But for the most part, He is the reason for this life and my pursuit of attempting to live as He calls us to.
It's the every day living that gets tangled for me...how do I react the person who cuts me off on my 5 block drive to work? Does the class that constantly tests my patience know that I'm really trying to love them? Am I supposed to work once Baby Bell comes? Am I OK if Micah stays home with the baby? We live fairly minimally as is, but am I OK letting the people we support know that we may have to cut their support so one of us can stay home with Baby? Is my family really my first ministry? If they are, why do I feel guilty about that?
You know, simple things...like how to live like Jesus.
So, I take December 25th to enjoy the blessings He has given...my family and my husband. A few gifts and a great meal. Time spent together. And I trust God still loves me-even if I forget to read Luke 2.
peace&love.
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